Divorce can undoubtedly be put in a bad light from time to time, especially when people use terms like "broken home" when describing a family split up by divorce. One psychologist considers the term very dated and says brokenness should not be based on whether parents are married but on what is actually going on in the home.
With that being said, it is still hard for parents not to feel bad about divorce when it comes to children. They may even stay together for the sake of their kids. But is that a mentality that really leads to happier kids? Not necessarily.
The psychologist points out that when parents are happy, kids can also be happy. Living in a household filled with constant volatility and negative emotions can be very hard on a child. Although there will be challenges along the way, having two parents that are split up but happy can actually help a child thrive.
Another fear that many parents have is that the divorce will somehow be detrimental to the child's future. The psychologist says research is "mixed on whether children of divorce will have relationship issues." She points out that, in general, relationships are one of the hardest parts of life and being a child of divorce will not necessarily affect that.
Finally, and likely most importantly, parents need to really examine their fears. Many people say they want to stay together for their children, but the real issues often have to do with fears of being alone, financial instability, and change. These are the types of issues that individuals can discuss with their lawyer, a therapist or close family and friends.