Tiger Woods, Separation & Reconciliation: Tips to Avoiding Divorce

News has it that Tiger Woods is trying to avert divorce in Florida courts and is seeking reconciliation with his wife, Elin Nordegren. The path toward reconciliation can be challenging, especially in the high-profile world of celebrity separation and possible divorce.

The Woods-Nordegren case has been made even more difficult because of the sensational nature of Woods’ numerous affairs.

But those things that made his case sensational also highlight the steps often needed to reconcile. For her part, Elin hired a high-power family law attorney – if only to prove the seriousness of her intentions or improve her negotiation position. To the outside observer, this move may have revealed the seriousness of her intentions – and scared him straight.

While statistics are hard to come by, reconciliation – even after one party cheats on the other, or one moves out of the residence – is not uncommon. But it often starts with an overture of remorse or corrective action. In Woods’ case, he apparently acknowledged to his wife the error of his ways, and sought counseling for his “addiction.”

Moreover, one detail the public may never know is whether reconciliation in the Woods-Nordegren case was tied to modification of the couple’s prenuptial agreement. Nordegren’s hiring of a powerful divorce attorney may have been an effort to get the prenup changed to her benefit.

In Florida, divorce court is set up to encourage reconciliation. Even if one party files for divorce, the courts can abate the action for 90 days while the parties attend marital counseling in the hopes of reconciling. Some judges will order the counseling with the abatement; others simply will give the parties 90 days before moving the case along to resolution.

Also, if one party hires and attorney and pays a retainer, that money stays “on account” and the party has counsel of record. If in a year resolution is deemed impossible and things just don’t work out, that party already has counsel and will not have to pay again until the initial retainer is used up.

Woods’ situation also highlights the role of counseling programs in the reconciliation process. From drug or alcohol counseling to anger management, marital, gambling or sexual counseling, to parenting courses and other intervention, these programs often are attended by one or both parties attempting to get back on track.

Separation is not the acknowledgement of a fait accompli. Think of it as a “cooling off” period needed for both parties to consider or reconsider their positions without the volatility or pressure of the other as a constant reminder or aggravating presence. It gives both a chance to emotionally calm down, seek guidance or counseling, forgive the other – or decide whether reconciliation is the next step in the couple’s path.

Leave a Reply

You can use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

Divorce Newsfeed

- The Sun-Sentinel – Fort Lauderdale, Florida – May 5, 2010 - Angela Neave Co-Chairs Legal Aid Service of Broward County Annual Fundraiser on May 14 “You've Been Served" is the theme for Legal Aid Service of Broward County's 9th Annual "For the Public Good" celebrating 36 years of securing justice and changing lives. The event committee co-chairperson is Angela Renee Neave, Esq., of the Law Offices of Barry I. Finkel, P.A. The event will take place at the Hilton Fort Lauderdale Marina located on 1881 SE 17th Street Causeway on May 14. The event begins at 6 p.m. with cocktails and silent auction followed by dinner and awards.

- The Huffington Post – February 28, 2010 - Committing Adultery? You Could Go to Jail So, did you notice what I noticed as Tiger Woods delivered his 14 minute nationally televised mea culpa last week? While he was busy admitting, "I was unfaithful. I had affairs. I cheated ..." What jumped out at me was what Tiger didn't mention. He confessed he'd broken the law. Adultery is a crime. I know that sounds odd and old fashioned. But the truth is that more than 20 states, including Florida where Wood's keeps his primary residence, still have laws on the books against cheating on your spouse.

- The Tampa Tribune / Tampa, FL – February 18, 2010 - Facebook Plus Divorce Equals Flammable Situation If eHarmony is the Web site bringing lovebirds to the threshold of marriage, Facebook is the one showing up for the divorce. The world's most popular social media site is revolutionizing the divorce experience, pouring toxin into virtually every stage of a collapsing marriage and rekindling old flames into blazing affairs.

- USAToday – January 19, 2010 - Marriage Benefits Men Economically, Too If you think women still reap more economic benefit than men do from marriage, you may be living in the past. Today, men are better off economically because their wives are, too, suggests a new study on the economics of marriage by the Pew Research Center.

- People – January 12, 2010 - Why Did Chris Evert and Greg Norman Divorce? The split between tennis star Chris Evert and golfing great Greg Norman, whose 15-month marriage ended in divorce last month, was a result of stress and strain over her teenage boys needing their mother, according to someone who observed the situation. 

- Fox News Online – January 11, 2010 - How to Talk to Your Kids About Divorce With roughly 50 percent of all marriages ending in divorce in the United States, it is all too common for children to endure all that comes along with families breaking up. Divorce can be scary and sad for all involved, but it can have a particular and lasting effect on children. Therefore, it's important to approach the subject delicately. We spoke with rabbi and psychotherapist M. Gary Neuman, who created the widely successful "Sandlecastles Program". He gave his tips on how to inclusively talk to your children to ensure they cope with divorce in a healthy and productive way. 

- Daily Finance – December 28, 2009 - Courts in Crisis: Recession Drives Caseloads Up, Budgets Down Court systems nationwide are facing two forces that could collide and create a major crisis in 2010. Caseloads driven by the recession are flooding the courts at the same time as judicial systems around the country are dealing with budget cuts. In some states, those budget cuts could slow the flow of paperwork and possibly even result in postponement of some trials. Courts are starting to see the full brunt of cases involving recession-related issues…Increasingly, what the courts are seeing are cases in which the root causes are families in crisis after losing their homes and jobs.

- New York Daily News – December 28, 2009 - NJ dad David Goldman will 'never understand' Brazilian family that fought him The New Jersey father reunited with his 9-year-old son after a bitter divorce and custody battle in Brazil says the boy has been adjusting well to his return to America – despite video footage taken before their reunion showing Sean Goldman crying in the arms of his stepfather.

- Boston Herald.com – December 27, 2009 - Will prenup stand up in Tiger divorce case? I hate to sound shallow, but do you think Tiger’s prenup will get thrown out because he was messing around? In order for a PMA to be enforced, Tiger had to make a full and fair disclosure of all of his assets and liabilities. That’s because Elin cannot waive her rights to something she did not know about...

- The South Florida Sun-Sentinel – December 15, 2009 - Report: Elin Nordegren plans to leave Tiger Woods People magazine is reporting that Elin Nordegren plans to divorce Tiger Woods. In its issue that arrives at newsstands on Friday, the magazine quotes a source close to Nordegren as saying, "She plans to leave Tiger." It cites another source as saying, "She's made up her mind. There's nothing to think about: he's never going to change."

- Daily Business Review – November 12, 2009 - Text Messages Can Spell D-I-V-O-R-C-E Divorce lawyers have found a new smoking gun to wave around in court: Text messages. Infidelity, bad parenting and threats - you name the issue in marital disputes, family law attorneys say, and the evidence can be found in text messsages sent over handheld gadgets.

- Earth Times – November 3, 2009 - Avoid Texting Marital, Extra-Marital or Negotiation Details - Or Risk Texts Becoming Evidence In the age of digital media and communications, there now are three sides to every divorce story: His, hers, and what's being stored by the phone company.

- Florida Today / Melbourne, Fla. – October 26, 2009 – Experts: Poor Economy Leads to violence Experts say tough economic times in general tend to introduce additional stressors in an already tense domestic situation. When abusive partners are laid off from work, experts say the severity and frequency of violent assaults tend to jump because the abuser is home more often.

- The Huffington Post – May 2008 – Nine Signs of a Cheating Spouse Financial infidelity is bad, but it's even worse when it is used to engage in an extramarital affair. Ruth Houston, the author of "Is He Cheating On You? 829 Telltale Signs," says to look for nine behaviors that may be indicators of a spouse's infidelity, starting with credit card statements that reflect charges for flowers, jewelry or other gift items that the spouse did not receive; unauthorized or surprise withdrawals from joint bank accounts; or deposit slips or bank statements that indicate the existence of a previously unknown checking or savings account in the wife's/husband's name only.

- Squidoo – How To Leave Your Husband Everyone has different reasons for contemplating something so drastic as leaving a spouse. It could be due to abuse, infidelity, lack of respect, or it could have been a mistake to just get married in the first place. If you are finding yourself asking the question of how to leave your husband, know you are not alone. Read here to learn more…

- MSN Money.com Get Real: Marriage is a Business Put aside the romantic notion that love conquers all -- and pull out your calculators. Successful partnerships require a plan, a CFO (usually) and regular progress reports.

Archives